I've struggled with my weight since I was a teenager. I always felt fat, although looking back, I had a nice figure. I guess I always compared myself to the girls I knew who hadn't quiet gotten their woman bodies! But I lived pretty unhealthily. Working through dinner, hitting BK on the way home, way probably what really did me in...oh don't forget the many times I didn't take a lunch and got a big Oatmeal Cream Pie and a MT Dew for lunch- that was a really BAD choice!!! When I lived in Mexico, after high school for 2 years, I had a lot of opportunities to walk everywhere I went, but I was lazy and drove a lot. When I moved back to the United States, I did a little half hearted dieting, but never stuck to anything. Even worse, I chose to take prescription diet pills that take away your hunger, but can also be hard on your heart.
When I met John, my now husband, and we started dating, we ate out all the time. There were many times when we were working together that we ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner at fast food restaurants. And I wasn't choosing to eat salads. I was eating Big Mac meals with large fries and a large regular Coke. Even after I watched the movie "Super Size Me" I still ate a lot of fast food! When we were getting ready to get married, I didn't care about dieting before the wedding, like a lot of brides. I thought "John loves me this way, so I'm not going to change anything!". Fast forward to my first pregnancy. I gained around 70 lbs, on top of my already overweight weight, leaving me obese. Plus after months of inactivity, I was sooooo out of shape!
When I got pregnant with my Oliveah, I promised John that I would only gain the minimum suggested to me by the doctors. I was pretty careful to not over eat and limit certain foods. I kept my weight gain to around 25 lbs. My Oliveah passed away, after being born with a lot of problems. After a couple months, I noticed that the scale was starting to go up again. I knew I was starting to resort to emotional eating. We went on a trip to Minneapolis in May of this year, 2 months after Oliveah passed. I felt like such a blob! I could barely walk around with my family. My body hurt soooo bad. I felt like I was disappointing everyone, and that I was an embarrassment. I could no longer take it. So in May, I started eating healthily. I got rid of all the "white" stuff, and started counting calories (I aim for 1500, but I will eat no more than 2000 calories a day... if you knew how many calories I was eating before, you know that this is cutting it by more than half.!) In June, we got a gym membership and started swimming 3 times a week. So we've been working out for a whole month now!
Swimming is something that I love to do. While walking, I've had a lot of lower back pain. With swimming, I am completely pain free. Yeah, its a little embarrassing getting in a swim suit when you're a big girl. Sure I've seen those teenage girls (the ones who parade half naked in their little bikinis) laugh and point at me. Its a little hurtful- but I am doing something to change myself for the better! This makes me feel better about myself!
Since making the changes, I've lost somewhere around 30 lbs. In the grand scheme of things, this is a very small number! But its a start! I'm starting to push myself to do a little more. I'm aiming for a minimum of 10 minutes of physical activity every day. But once the clock hits 9 minutes, most times I say "Lets do another 10 minutes!". Soon my original ten minutes have become 30 minutes! It feels good to be able to walk again! I went to the zoo last week and was able to walk all over, with barely any back pain! Two months ago, I would have chosen to not go to the zoo!
I'm really excited about the kind of impact this lifestyle will have on my family. I really don't want to have an inactive family who thinks of family fun as being only watching a movie together or going to dinner. I want it to be something active. I want Emelie to choose healthy foods over junk food. I have to be the one to bring the change! I am so happy to be moving in this direction. Thats why this blog is called "On My Way Down".
I look forward to writing about more changes in the future. I can't wait to one day be able to say "We went on a 20 mile bike ride" or "I just ran my first 5k!". But for today I can say "I marched in place for 30 minutes early to day, and I treaded water for 60 minutes!" :)
